Real vampires don’t sparkle

Sparkling love. A true fairy tale filled with romance and dramatic couples like something out of Sha

Sparkling love. A true fairy tale filled with romance and dramatic couples like something out of Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.” Not something you would expect to read in a book supposedly about vampires. But nowadays monsters have been transformed. No longer are monsters blood-craving creatures that live under your bed and make you have nightmares, but rather romantic beings that make people fantasize and swoon. That’s not how monsters are supposed to be depicted, especially vampires.

When people think of vampires, the first thing that should come to mind is “Dracula” by Bram Stoker, a book filled with images of dreary castles, nightmarish characters with glowing red eyes burning with the intent to kill and drain the blood of their victims. Those are real vampires. These days, if vampires are mentioned to any high school students, Stephanie Meyers’ “Twilight” series is the first thing that they discuss. But honestly, how can we even be sure that the Edward of so many girls’ fantasies, the main vampire in the “Twilight” series, is an actual vampire?

Well, let’s run through the qualities of a vampire. A vampire sleeps in a coffin and doesn’t go out into sunlight, for he would be reduced to ashes. Edward not only doesn’t sleep in a coffin but doesn’t sleep at all, and he also doesn’t go out into sunlight because if he did he would sparkle. Sparkle? Very scary, right? Vampires most definitely DO NOT SPARKLE. Vampires have large sharp fangs that protrude from their mouths. Edward simply has sharp teeth. Now, any human can have sharp teeth; that doesn’t make them a vampire. Vampires are burned by holy relics, they can’t stand the scent of garlic and they can transform into things such as bats, wolves and white mist. All of these things are barely even mentioned in the “Twilight” series.

Last but not least, there’s the blood lust of vampires. Although it’s true that Edward has that blood lust, so do lots of monsters. Just because he likes blood doesn’t make him a vampire. So if Edward’s not a vampire, then what is he exactly? Considering the blood lust, it’s apparent he’s some type of monster but not a vampire.

It is almost as if Stephanie Meyer did close to no research on what a vampire actually is; she’s barely grazed the true world of vampires. Vampires are soulless monsters. It’s as simple as that — they are not romantic and they share nothing in common with the stuff used in art class to make things glisten.

If you want to read a real vampire book, one outside the fantasies and romantic world of “Twilight,” read Anne Rice’s series “The Vampire Chronicles.” Rice is far from a romance aficionado, and although she too strays somewhat from Stoker’s idea of a vampire, it’s definitely not a world filled with superficial sparkles.

Alie Gillespie is a senior at Notre Dame-Bishop Gibbons

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